I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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