so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
