i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
