I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
