in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize
