Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
