I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
