um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
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