why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
