How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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