absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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