yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Randomize
