D3 body, D1 cock
At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
