Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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