Why are handjobs necessary in class?
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Randomize
