Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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