We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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