Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
