Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Randomize
