Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
