Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Randomize
