Cold hands, warm shart.
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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