She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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