? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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