You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
