It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
