Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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