I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
