So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Randomize
