How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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