i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
