it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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