Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
