..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Randomize
