I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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