I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize
