Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
