So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Randomize
