you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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