Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Randomize
