Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
They have beer where we have blood.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
