we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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