May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
