So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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