Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
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