i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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