I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
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