Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
The adults are the big ones right?
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
