I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
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