This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
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