dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
