I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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