Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Randomize
